From Basketmouth.

Mr Akpors ordered for a voice automated robot car that does anything he tells it to do correctly without any error.

He got the car and started
sending it on errands. He was so proud of what the car can do without mistakes.

He was not able to go out on a day, his wife told him to tell the car to go and pick the children
from school because she was so tired.

Mr Akpors agreed.

Mr Akpors: Car, go and bring my children from school.

The car went and didn't return in time as expected, they knew
something must be
wrong.

Several hours later and no car, Mr
Akpors became worried, dressed up, ready to lodge a report at the
police station. He and his wife just stepped outside when they saw the car
coming with an overload of children.
The car parked right in front of them and said, "These are your
children sir"

In the car was their Landlady's
two daughters, their choir mistress
two sons, his wife's best friend's daughter, their
pastor's son and their neighbours two sons.

Wife: Don't tell me all these ones are your children?

Mr Akpors, nonplussed, calmly replied..

DEAR,CAN YOU TELL ME WHY YOUR OWN CHILDREN ARE NOT IN THE CAR??
I NEED SOME EXPLANATION. ℓ☺ℓ

No More Drinking

Akpos The Comedian 44 minutes ago · Akpos went to Mama Put's shop and ordered 3 bottles of Ogogoro. He drank them one after the other. Day after day, he repeated the ritual. He would order three bottles of the strong drink, and empty them one after the other. One day Mama Put became curious and asked him why he did that. "You see, I have two brothers. One is now in Australia and the other is in England. We made a pact that we will remember one another when we drink." Sometime later, he came into the bar and ordered only two bottles of Ogogoro. Mama Put felt that something was wrong. "I am sorry to see that you have lost one of your brothers.". "No," he said, "I still have two brothers." "Then why do you order only two bottles?" "You see," Akpos explained, "recently my wife took me to a crusade. To the glory of God, I have decided to stop drinking." Describe Akpos in one word?

Messi of Barca

Messi's girlfriend was trying to
wake Messi this morning. In the
process, she said, "Messi, Messi,
its 8!" Messi replied: "They scored
again?" Girlfriend: "No, it's 8am.
Time for training."

Cunny guy die, cunny girl bury am

​Folake came to Lagos on a visit. She asked me for tђε 10k I promised her.:) I then told her that I was on my way to Benin. That she should take my ATM card & withdraw all she wants. (knowing fully well that I had less than 3k in d account)=)) . As soon as she
kissed me & left, I quickly left tђε house knowing she will come crying back to me. As I got to my junction Sonuga-Sonex, 'Deji my friend. called me on phone saying =-c " gbenga, thanks a lot I've paid tђε 120,000k back into uя account". Mheeeen, see sweat!:]xx X-o
Tried calling folake's phone, switched off.>:O  Next thing, debit alerts: 40k, 40k,40k, even 2k.:'(  Next thing I knew, I found myself on hospital bed. Now they are asking me what happened?
But what will I say???" If na u how much wl u draw? Wetin u think sef?

Happy New Month.

I cannot categorically wish U a Happy New month now, because I may say it now and my oga at the top wil say its WORKER'S DAY. Anyway---ww.
HAPPY NEW MONTH,Datz All!